When you are eating out, do you talk about other food places?

I find it funny that when I'm eating out at a restaurant, the conversation always drifts toward discussing other eateries and what is liked and disliked about each one. You'd think that you'd want to show respect due the eating establishment where you are currently consuming products. I was wondering if this practice is applicable to all subjects and arenas of life.

For instance, when talking to a friend do people stay in the parameters of that friendship or does the topic hop to other friends. I wonder how that affects that present dialoging aquaintance. Do you find yourself talking about other movies while in a theater (theatre for you civilized readers)? Does your conversation roam to other songs while enjoying a musical number in your friend’s car? Can you really watch a game and not reminisce about games of ole' ?(I love that word. I wish I could add an apostrophe to any word and make it more special)

I think we can't give attention to our current situation because we operate in a competitively comparative community. (Alliteration...I love it!) Really...I typically blame it on my self-diagnosed ADD. It's really because I can't stop comparing. I do it. You do it. Of course I do it better than you. And you believe you are better than me but that's just being overly comparative. I am better though!

So the next time you are crunching your assumedly "free" chips and salsa; check yourself (for spillage of said tomato based appetizer) and see how comparative you are. Then listen to your cohorts and see how comedic their comparative communication comes across.

Then grade yourself accordingly:
1 pt. for you - for each comparison that you make that makes more sense then your competitor's.
2 pts. for you - for each comparison your competitor coughs up which was concocted by another contestant yet claimed by current competitor.
3 pts. for you - for each situation where you didn't create the comparison contest conversation.

If you score:
6-9 you are a normal human being and you should feel confident you aren't overly comparative. 10-15 you are very comparatively prone and you should curb your competitive predisposition. 16 or higher go get help!

Happy New Year 101

I mean I'm all about being friendly, but how long into the actual New Year do you wish others a hearty, "Happy New Year"?

I saw a friend today that I hadn't seen since Christmas. She said, "Happy New Year" and I responded with an echoing greeting referring to the said year and its newness. Then I thought, "How far into the said year of newness do you use that greeting?" It's actually a very fundamental thing for me. I'm wondering. So to cure my anxiety I have come up with the official rules for New Year's greetings.

Happy New Year is a correct greeting in the following situations:

1. When used greeting a person you see during the dates of Jan. 1st - Jan. 5th.
2. When used greeting a person you haven't seen since the new year began when the date is on or before Jan. 15th. (after the 15th it really is too late and if you haven't seen that person since the 1st then you really can't call them a friend now can you?)
3. When greeting a person you have met for the first time on or before Jan. 15th.

So to all of you I haven't met yet, "Happy New Year!"
To those whom I call friends and I haven't seen you since Jan. 1st, "Happy New Year!"

I had to say it because it's too close to the 15th and I don't want to forget.

I don't read books...

But I got in bed way past my bed time and hours past my 1.5 year old son's bed time. I grabbed my reading light, yes I have a reading light and I'm not an AARP member. It attaches to the back of your book which makes for an interesting balancing act to keep your book up-right. Also it has a 6 foot wire running to the cigarette carton-sized battery pack, which doesn't keep the flow of electricity consistently causing the light to skip between bright to dim to retinal damage to bright again. (no wonder I thought it was The Chronicles of Barney and couldn't find the silly purple blob-thingy singing songs with 2 teeth. I mean really he has one tooth on his top jaw and one on the bottom jaw...I KNOW HE DOESN'T FLOSS-LUCKY!)

I started Searching For God Knows What by Donald Miller. I figured I'd begin by enjoying chapter one, fall asleep in the middle of chapter two and try a week later picking back up and then getting frustrated that I forgot where I was, then placing it in a prominent spot where people would see it and think, "Wow he reads books". But I couldn't put it down. I loved it.

It was 1:45 AM when I realized I had read the first two chapters and wasn't even blurry-eyed. So I put it down and picked up the next day. I'm not done, but it's a fun book.

I appreciate Don's style. (We had lunch once so we call each other by shortened versions of our first names...well I do; he can't figure out how to shorten Mac.) I feel as if we are sitting at a coffee house and he is talking about last week, while a couple of guys across the fence drum out an earthy beat on weathered Djembes.

You should check this book out. I hope you will experience it the way I have. Of course your reading light is probably better than mine...whatever.

And they say flossing is good for you...

On my last visit to the dentist, in a manner similar to a 2nd grade teacher explaining absolute truths like gravity, he said, "There are some people who can go their whole life not flossing their teeth and they are fine...You aren't one of those people." Imagine that.

I immediately took offense to his harsh evaluation of my oral hygiene. However as the white tonsil sucker was hissing and fighting with my tongue, and as he named and numbered each of my previous fillings; I realized this guy just might be right. I mean that plaque on the wall wasn't bad like the plaque on my teeth. That framed paper said he had proven himself worthy of a degree. Which means his opinion, most likely, is correct.

So I agreed with him. As I removed my tiny napkin, obviously designed for a smurf or something smaller than human, and received my party favor bag (feeling robbed because he didn't offer me a sucker); I promised to floss.

So I have been flossing. You can ask my wife. She should know because she's been following that rule her whole life. Well last night I was flossing my teeth when the string got caught between two teeth. As I attempted to saw it back and forth to remove it, there was a pop followed by a small UOO (Unidentified Oral Object) bouncing around and landing on my tongue. After the initial shock and wondering I discovered it was a loose filling! Yeah I know WOW!

I told Sam and she began to sway side to side holding onto the bathroom counter asking me to stop talking about it or she would faint. Right then I thought, "Hah. He told me to floss and I did and look what it got me; a hole in my tooth."

So maybe flossing isn't that great for you. Or maybe I just didn't floss consistently my whole life and that's why I had the filling in the first place. I'm calling him today to set up another appointment. I just hope I can keep myself from telling him he caused this to happen. Of course he will retort in a smarty-pants, stern-medical-sounding-tone of voice, "This wouldn't have happened if you would have flossed all along." I hate it when people are right.

Ipeed once...now Ipod!

Well I did it. I have stepped into the world of Ipod. I never thought I'd come this far. I have so many people to thank.
I'd love to thank my first radio for being there through all those tough times(Lionel...Oooo what a feeling, Huey...I'm happy to be stuck with you too, Julio...wow to all those girls you loved before). My first Walkman(Dion...I put away my idols, Petra...more Power to ya, Jon...I'm living on a prayer, Eddie...Jeremy spoke in my class too). My first car stereo, with an 8 track player(Kenny...I know when to hold 'em). My first CD player(Stevie...my sky is crying, Run..you are the king of rock, Joe...love bites dude).
Anyway I'm loving this Ipod Nano. 500 songs I mean that's a lot. seriously name 500 songs...quick...see you can't. I'm excited I just hope I don't drop it down a parking lot grate will walking out of Target.
Ipeed, Ipaid, Ipod!